Fake Productive
I break promises to myself all the time and I am really proud of me for not promising myself consistency with this blog thing, even though I really wanted to, because writing the first post felt like a start, and a starting point is always more dramatic with a promise of change.
For a long time I would find myself starting every document I write with "I wish", and a while after I noticed that it became so annoying, so I'd start it with "I wish I'd stop wishing". Most of my wishes were pretty realistic, so I could go and work towards them becoming true right then, but I wouldn't, I'd sit there typing my wishes and wishing I'd type faster and that I did not give up learning to touch-type in grade 11 when I had the time to pick it up again at that exact moment. It is like writing about them gave me a transient feeling of accomplishment, like the first step towards my wishes is documenting them, and then I'd enjoy that for a very short time and that would be the end of it. I stopped that now because I have annoyed me enough, it doesn't mean I've started taking constructive steps towards them, but at least now I am not inducing an unnecessary kick out of actually doing nothing.
To-do lists. I love them, I've been with them since I started going to school, they are such an ingrained strategy now that it's actually hard to give up, even if I try, and I know that because I tried. Why bring them up now? Because my flow sucks, the more important reason though that they induce the same unnecessary kick of accomplishment even though they technically represent zero progress. I know they are helpful; until they trick you into thinking that that's enough. I am very good at writing them and I am bad at executing them, then I realized that I feel better just by writing them, by crossing things off. So I am giving them up, not totally though, they are genuinely helpful after all. I just gave up obsessing over them. Strangely, since I realized that* I am actually inclined to get more done, less effort in making a pretty looking super detailed to-do list and more effort to summoning the will to actually start working on those items.
*I realized that while listening to Tom and Martin's College Info Geek podcast. (Good recommendation if you like listening to things that don't necessarily make you more productive but get you motivated to be more productive.
For a long time I would find myself starting every document I write with "I wish", and a while after I noticed that it became so annoying, so I'd start it with "I wish I'd stop wishing". Most of my wishes were pretty realistic, so I could go and work towards them becoming true right then, but I wouldn't, I'd sit there typing my wishes and wishing I'd type faster and that I did not give up learning to touch-type in grade 11 when I had the time to pick it up again at that exact moment. It is like writing about them gave me a transient feeling of accomplishment, like the first step towards my wishes is documenting them, and then I'd enjoy that for a very short time and that would be the end of it. I stopped that now because I have annoyed me enough, it doesn't mean I've started taking constructive steps towards them, but at least now I am not inducing an unnecessary kick out of actually doing nothing.
To-do lists. I love them, I've been with them since I started going to school, they are such an ingrained strategy now that it's actually hard to give up, even if I try, and I know that because I tried. Why bring them up now? Because my flow sucks, the more important reason though that they induce the same unnecessary kick of accomplishment even though they technically represent zero progress. I know they are helpful; until they trick you into thinking that that's enough. I am very good at writing them and I am bad at executing them, then I realized that I feel better just by writing them, by crossing things off. So I am giving them up, not totally though, they are genuinely helpful after all. I just gave up obsessing over them. Strangely, since I realized that* I am actually inclined to get more done, less effort in making a pretty looking super detailed to-do list and more effort to summoning the will to actually start working on those items.
*I realized that while listening to Tom and Martin's College Info Geek podcast. (Good recommendation if you like listening to things that don't necessarily make you more productive but get you motivated to be more productive.
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